little snakes | szaleniec1000

In This World and the Next Chapter 8

szaleniec1000 May 18, 2013 16:21

At taekarado's suggestion, ITWATN!Harry shall henceforth be known as SCBE, because he's a self-centred bellend.

( ITWATN Chapter 8 )

epic fail, percy is evil, plagiarism, quidditch needs more love, everyone is evil, moustache twirling, agony of the stick, informed wrongness, ron is evil, little snakes, i hate that you have a cock, pov!fail, reading the books is a good idea, harry is an idiot, metaphor fail, badfic:in this world and the next, tractum ex culo, hermione in name only, lucius is ooc, what were the betas doing, credit where it's due, harry potter, convention of the psychics, said bookism, dumbledore is evil, snape is ooc, continuity isn't optional, wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff

Deserving Chapter 53

szaleniec1000 Oct 19, 2011 11:51

I'd almost given up checking for updates, then on I go to the Uber-Pit and what do I find? Ladies and gentlemen, this is it.

( It's also very long. )

show don't tell, exquisite burn, please form an orderly queue, how do i used tense, little snakes, pov!fail, welsh railway, fucking self-awareness how does it work, literal butthurt, the lowercase wizarding world, mary sue and gary stu, allcaps of doom, damning with faint praise, single is a douche, convention of the psychics, epic fail, rutting deer symbolism, wrong word dammit, alabaster bottom, department of redundancy department, badfic:deserving, i hate that you have a cock, you call that pacing, department of buggery, nudity for everyone, incantations do not work that way, kingsley is ooc, harry potter, epithet overload, said bookism, harry the pervert, continuity isn't optional, snape is ooc

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Happy belated birthday, fly_buggy_fly !

Chapter 49 is the last chapter of Deserving posted so far, and I don't know if/when it'll be finished. It was posted in November so who knows. All snark aside, speaking as a person rather than a reviewer, I honestly hope the author is okay.

( Deserving Chapter 49 )

show don't tell, please form an orderly queue, wrong word dammit, lamarcked ones, department of redundancy department, badfic:deserving, little snakes, reading the books is a good idea, pov!fail, fucking self-awareness how does it work, mary sue and gary stu, mione my arse, credit where it's due, single is a douche, harry potter, said bookism, viagra

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Deserving Chapter 47

szaleniec1000 Jan 28, 2011 00:32

The author now apparently has a technical writing beta. I don't see any improvement in the technical quality of the writing, but this chapter is triple-spaced again. I don't know if there's a connection there.

( Deserving Chapter 47 )

a description would be nice, department of redundancy department, expospeak, badfic:deserving, i hate that you have a cock, little snakes, the anvil symbolises heavy-handedness, pov!fail, priorities be damned, americanisms in the potterverse, kingsley is ooc, epithet overload, harry potter, convention of the psychics, said bookism, continuity isn't optional

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Deserving Chapter 44

szaleniec1000 Jan 15, 2011 01:02

The story so far: Severus has given birth to Harry's daughter with the aid of a Gorean centaur. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Deserving means never having to say you're bullshitting. If TVTropes still had the I Am Not Making This Up section, the entire fic could have gone in there.

( Deserving Chapter 44 (NSFW) )

epic fail, centaur buggery, please form an orderly queue, ivory seed, alabaster bottom, a sure sign of a diseased mind, expospeak, badfic:deserving, little snakes, the anvil symbolises heavy-handedness, centaur of gor, literal butthurt, rectuuum!, americanisms in the potterverse, mary sue and gary stu, allcaps of doom, how is babby formed, ruler, celebrian wants her buttplug back, you fail paediatrics forever, incantations do not work that way, harry potter, brain bleach, viagra, dada

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Deserving Chapters 42-43

szaleniec1000 Jan 13, 2011 22:26

Welcome back to Deserving. Chapters 42 and 43 follow directly on from each other, so here they are as a double bill.

( Deserving Chapters 42-43 (NSFW) )

shag like a pirate, please form an orderly queue, what do you mean it's not awesome, train wreck, aaaaaaaaaaaaa!, bad sex, conflict be damned, department of redundancy department, badfic:deserving, little snakes, the anvil symbolises heavy-handedness, fucking self-awareness how does it work, centaur of gor, rectuuum!, americanisms in the potterverse, the lowercase wizarding world, mary sue and gary stu, allcaps of doom, how is babby formed, ministrations, milking the giant cow, you fail paediatrics forever, single is a douche, convention of the psychics, epithet overload, harry potter, viagra, dada

Deserving Chapter 41

szaleniec1000 Jan 11, 2011 23:25

Chapter 40, it must be said, is quite seriously one of the worst things I've read in my decade in fanfic-land. You know you've hit rock bottom when you're thinking that at least it's not quite as bad as Celebrian or Agony in Pink. 41 represents a slight improvement, but make no mistake: Deserving still sucks.

( Deserving Chapter 41 (NSFW) )

show don't tell, please form an orderly queue, date with rosie palms, the pansexual '50s, ivory seed, a description would be nice, bad sex, paedofinder general, lamarcked ones, the dursleys aren't paedophiles, badfic:deserving, little snakes, anvil of foreshadowing, rectuuum!, mary sue and gary stu, how is babby formed, disembodied dialogue, kingsley is ooc, dumbledorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre!, convention of the psychics, harry potter, viagra, eau de badfic, dada

Deserving Retrospective and Chapter 40

szaleniec1000 Jan 10, 2011 14:34

As this is the fortieth chapter (yay?) let's take a look at the highlights (lowlights?) so far.

( long list, some NSFW descriptions )

epic fail, what do you mean it's not awesome, retrospective, ivory seed, a description would be nice, bad sex, too much information, badfic:deserving, little snakes, literally painful to read, fucking self-awareness how does it work, literal butthurt, americanisms in the potterverse, the lowercase wizarding world, goatse, sanity slippage, how is babby formed, celebrian wants her buttplug back, o fortuna moment, madam malkin's mugglewear, harry potter, brain bleach, viagra, eau de badfic, dada, singularity of fail

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Deserving Chapter 30

szaleniec1000 Nov 28, 2010 18:11

Chapter 30, as befits its milestone number, is a real corker.
( Deserving Chapter 30 )

sophisticated as hell, tara's narmful bondage, department of redundancy department, expospeak, badfic:deserving, i hate that you have a cock, little snakes, anvil of foreshadowing, reading the books is a good idea, harry is an idiot, fucking self-awareness how does it work, literal butthurt, insulin needed, mary sue and gary stu, americanisms in the potterverse, doubt your commitment to sparkle motion, allcaps of doom, you fail paediatrics forever, single is a douche, credit where it's due, brain bleach, epithet overload, harry potter, said bookism, dada, elf sex, continuity isn't optional

Deserving Chapter 29

szaleniec1000 Nov 27, 2010 18:45

Chapter 29 is very short, again by the writer's own admission, so I'm hoping to get 30 done later tonight or tomorrow. I initially intended it to be a double bill, but the author has managed to cram a lot of fail into not many words. By the way, triple-spacing your text so it looks longer doesn't work.
( Deserving Chapter 29 )

please form an orderly queue, whoring money, a description would be nice, department of redundancy department, informed wrongness, expospeak, badfic:deserving, i hate that you have a cock, little snakes, anvil of foreshadowing, reading the books is a good idea, priorities be damned, insulin needed, mary sue and gary stu, allcaps of doom, you fail paediatrics forever, credit where it's due, incantations do not work that way, epithet overload, harry potter, said bookism, pronouns don't do that, dada, continuity isn't optional, passive voice